Christmas is often described as the most wonderful time of the year. For children, it’s a season filled with excitement, familiar traditions, and moments that become lifelong memories. But when parents live separately, the festive period can also bring uncertainty, stress and heightened emotions.
Who has Christmas Eve? What happens on Boxing Day? Can the children see both sides of the family? And how do you protect the magic of Christmas without turning it into a battleground?
With Christmas now only a few weeks away, many separated parents are feeling the pressure to finalise arrangements. The good news is that with calm communication and a clear plan, it is possible to create a joyful, secure Christmas for your children — and a far less stressful one for you.
And importantly: Paradigm Family Law LLP is open throughout Christmas and New Year.
If anything unexpected arises, or you need urgent advice or reassurance, we are here to help.
Why Planning Ahead Still Matters (Even in December)
It may feel as though the festive countdown is well underway, but there is still time to put clear, child-focused arrangements in place.
Planning now helps because:
• Children need certainty – Knowing where they’ll be helps them feel secure and excited.
• Court availability is extremely limited – December is the busiest time of the year for the Family Court, and last-minute applications are rarely heard in time.
• Clear expectations reduce conflict – A written plan prevents last-minute misunderstandings or emotionally charged discussions.
Life happens — illness, weather disruptions, last-minute travel issues — so build some flexibility into your plan. Calm, early communication now can prevent conflict later.
Common Christmas Contact Arrangements
There is no single “right” arrangement. The best plan is the one that works for your children and is realistic for both parents.
1. Alternate Christmases
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One parent has the children this year, the other next year.
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Reduces pressure and creates meaningful time for both households.
2. Splitting Christmas Day
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Morning with one parent, afternoon with the other.
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Ideal when parents live close by and want children to enjoy celebrations with both families.
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Try to minimise long journeys — no child wants to spend Christmas Day in the car.
3. Sharing the Festive Period
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One parent has Christmas Eve and Christmas Day, the other has Boxing Day or New Year.
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Allows for relaxed, quality time without rushing between homes.
4. Creative Approaches
Separated families often discover that new traditions can be just as magical:
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A “second Christmas” on another day
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Creating new rituals in each home
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Involving grandparents or extended family where appropriate
Children often embrace having two Christmases — it becomes a special part of their new rhythm.
How to Keep Things Calm and Child-Focused
Communication is key. December is busy and emotions can run high. If face-to-face conversations feel difficult, messages through email or a parenting app help keep discussions neutral and clear, while also creating a written record.
Here are practical tips for a smooth festive season:
• Agree arrangements now – The earlier in December, the better.
• Put the children first – What will make their Christmas feel comfortable and enjoyable?
• Minimise Christmas Day travel – Keep journeys short and predictable.
• Coordinate presents – To avoid duplication, confusion or competitive gifting.
• Confirm plans in writing – A short message avoids misunderstandings.
• Stick to the agreement – Children feel most secure with consistency. If plans must change, communicate clearly and kindly.
What If You Still Can’t Reach an Agreement?
If discussions are proving difficult, there are still constructive ways forward:
Mediation
A calm, neutral environment where a trained mediator helps parents reach a child-focused agreement.
Parenting Plans
A written plan that sets out arrangements for Christmas, holidays and regular contact.
Provides clarity and reduces the likelihood of future conflict.
Collaborative Law
Parents and lawyers work together — around a table — to reach an agreement without court.
Supportive, discreet and focused on long-term cooperation.
Arbitration
A private process where an arbitrator makes a binding decision.
Faster and more flexible than court — helpful when time is short.
Court Orders
A last resort.
Courts prioritise the child’s welfare, but December listings are extremely limited.
If you think formal intervention may be needed, seek specialist advice as soon as possible.
Keeping Children at the Heart of Christmas
Children should never feel responsible for choosing between parents. You can listen to their feelings, but the adults must make the final decisions.
Help children feel secure by:
• Keeping adult disagreements away from them
• Reassuring them that both parents love them deeply
• Acknowledging that Christmas may feel different this year
• Creating new traditions they can enjoy in each home
Your calmness, clarity and reassurance will shape their festive experience more than the exact schedule.
A Quick December Checklist
✔ Finalise arrangements early
✔ Prioritise the children’s wellbeing
✔ Keep communication short, calm and clear
✔ Confirm everything in writing
✔ Be flexible when unexpected issues arise
✔ Consider mediation if discussions stall
With thoughtful planning and a child-centred approach, Christmas can still be warm, joyful and magical — even across two homes.
We Are Here Throughout Christmas & New Year
If you need help finalising arrangements, reviewing an order, or responding to a last-minute issue, Paradigm Family Law LLP remains open throughout the festive period.
Whether you need urgent advice or simply some clarity about your options, our specialist team is here to support you.
📧 info@paradigmfamilylaw.co.uk
📞 01904 217225 or mobile: 07592 504136
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Our Content Explained
All content is correct on the date of publication, but it should not be relied upon as legal advice. For tailored guidance on your situation, please contact one of our specialist family lawyers.